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the 12th light…

August 14, 2015


came in an instant after a season of many years of a far lesser feeling of love than anything i would’ve ever opted for, yet it did arrive – and thank God for it – in the classic light of saying it was just a matter of time i imagine rings rather true yet when it all began those very words only added to the hurt – nonetheless time certainly has ferreted out to be an ally in the healing yet in getting to that exact point it was a far greater matter of diving deep well beyond where i ever knew even existed – in other words in all of the intensive introspection day after day and for now what’s been year after year, it was the guiding word of God himself as he is within us that literally began writing the story of what can only be called the answer – and quite an answer it’s been in as great of a depth as much as that of a truly unlimited love unlike i’d ever felt before – and in that answer as to the why and the when and what would otherwise be a frightening what now, a far greater light of the very meaning of life itself and how to live it has been so lovingly revealed to me and that’s made it all well more than worth the tremendously painful freight that’s been paid on it in getting there –

in this time i’ve come to further understand with more and more of an instantaneous precision so many of the amazing ways that God’s hand is perfectly guiding me in all that i’m doing and in everywhere that i’m headed, and for that i am thankful well beyond what any words could ever express – and as that’s all happening i’m finding myself living every day with the truly soul-satisfying feeling that all is weller than well and that i am indeed on the very path of my greatest destiny – and in that destiny there’s further been a truly immeasurable faith now resonating within me that’s leading me into the fast lane of my dreams where i’m seeing and hearing so much more of everything that cannot be seen and heard yet i am as that’s the way of the light as it is within us as the holy spirit – it’s as fascinating as it is funny at times at how otherwise improbable something would seem to be in happening yet when we’re coming into a way of life of designing our days just to our liking and then seeing it happen we also now know why it’s happening – and that is truly living life as it was intened to be at the hand of God as simply met with a faithful vision – i can only imagine just how beautifully wonderful my second act is surely going to be and therein lies the brilliance of it all in that i, just like you, only need to imagine it as when it’s with God it’ll indeed most certainly come to be – wishing you one in the very same and God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

destiny, determination and God…

July 28, 2015

is exactly the equation well underway in getting me there right on time and in just the right fashion – and as much as it may seem all the way to the contrary at moments in our lives when some things seemed toʼve suddenly headed sideways, iʼve ever so thankfully come to learn from the wisdom of the ages that itʼs these very markers thatʼll indeed further and far faster guide us as we gain the perspective of recognizing them for what they really are right as theyʼre happening – in fact iʼm finding they can actually even serve to lift us directly onto the far righter track weʼve been meant for all along – as well iʼm coming to further find that as we rise up in nearly instantly embracing these initially unwelcome changes, and even more so the ones that seem so destabilizing, that something rather amazing happens – something rather amazing and at times truly confounding happens when weʼre new to the game of truly unlimited faith in that the so-called coincidence of good timing begins happening with new windows lifting as well as entirely new doors beginning to appear if not indeed swinging wide open – 

yet this isnʼt exactly what weʼll find as weʼre coming into these kind of changes if itʼs with an ineffectively blind heart as thatʼs an altogether different reality – however, that can all turn on a dime in one swift measure in finally finding faith in the purest sense of everything that it is to believe in the almighty hand of God leading us in love at every turn in our lives – yet in turning on that dime itʼs imperative in understanding that itʼs entirely upon us as the one to raise our hand in reaching out and up and ultimately within in finding the greater love of God – yet right as we do thatʼs when it all changes into a life less ordinary and indeed to a one far more extraordinary than itʼs ever been before as thatʼs the overwhelmingly wild and wonderful way of living from within the holy spirit – and when itʼs a life of living from within the holy spirit itʼs a life of freely following the light in everything that we do and in everwhere that we travel from one minute to the next and thatʼs where truly living all begins, and all it takes is just the slightest touch of complete faith – wishing you one in the very same and Godʼs every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

kelly’s in the city…

July 10, 2015


streets in the middle of the pace of the people in a party celebrating what it is to simply see life in all of its colors and yet the many of them still went blind when he simply said please – so sad it was at the onset yet a surprise it just unfortunately wasn’t – all that he first said to me with the sweetest sincerity was literally please brother can you spare just ninety cents for me to get back home…to my tent? – thankfully i had a few bills with me and i fastly handed him a five knowing in every thread of who I am and in how I was raised that it was absolutely the right thing to do – he quickly and very graciously thanked me as if i’d given him the whole entire world as he further told me he’d already asked some seventy one other people (as he said he’d counted) before me with not a one of them willing to lend a hand – he then went on to ask me in a rhythm of hope and as if he very clearly already knew were we christians to which we immediately both answered yes – at that moment a far greater sense of life rapidly began returning to his eyes that previously was nearly absent as if his very faith was beginning to effectively zero out – and then he requested of us with such a longing in his heart if we’d indeed pray over him and that’s exactly what we did – in fact kelly further pleaded in the softest of hearts (yet one that was clearly hurting) if we’d each take ahold of his hands and “do this right” were his words with a glint in his eye as if hope was now returning to his presence right at that very instant as we did – we prayed over this humble and hurting man as he told us he was an army veteran from the iraqi conflict and that his challenge since coming home has been that he’s become an alcoholic in trying to wash away the truly harrowing pain of post traumatic stress disorder (or “ptsd” as it’s so often referred to as) and that it’s now landed him on the streets –

so i said everything that i was led to say from within offering kelly as much brotherly love as i knew how in the way of encouraging him to feel the strength of God within him in the way of the holy spirit and further encouraging him that even i as his brand new acquaintance believed in his ability to rise up and through the challenges in front of him as he like the rest of us has been gifted with blessings the world is needing from him – to that prayer kelly further came to life as he ever so graciously thanked us again for lending him a hand and even more so for our praying for him as he actually quite amazingly and so incredibly lovingly referred to me at that point as pastor, by which of course i’d never been called ever before yet what an honor it was as he said it nonetheless – and then such as life is so often we simply went our separate ways with kelly disappearing into the night and my nephew and i heading onto the rest of artwalk yet something foundationally had changed within us – something so foundationally had changed within us as no longer could we see everything through the same eyes as before as we’d now been given an entirely unexpected and exceptionally profound gift of newly seeing and feeling with a far greater perspective of compassion for our fellow man – in reflecting it was truly a gift of many blessings effectively being offered for only a spare ninety cents yet in just a matter of mere minutes what was given to us we quickly and thankfully realized was simply priceless, kelly our prayers are with you brother – wishing you one in the same and God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

i am passion…

June 18, 2015


and in every way of the spirit and the strength and the love of God within me it’s all happening – it’s all happening and it always has been even when for the many of most of my years I was blinded by the light of thinking the man in my mind was actually the one at the wheel – how fascinating it truly is in the capacity i’m constantly gaining in finding so much amusement at the earlier version of me – yet that’s the way it is in life when we’ve finally and fully embraced the journey of what it is that’s leading us onto the path that so many earlier forks in the road have ultimately and nonetheless now lead to, my path – and i’m finding all of it to be quite the thrilling ride in so many ways – you see there’s always been a feeling right from the very beginning in the way that it felt in just going with it as to who i was made to be and that indeed’s lead to a lifetime of seemingly unlimited memories of meeting and making new friends – as well as meeting and making new friends it’s very much also been carrying on in shall we say the fondest and the funnest of fashion with all of those i’ve always been so close with from the truest of friends to the very select few i’ve come to have the most wonderfully heartfelt love for that’s made my life far from ordinary and for it all i’m thankful beyond measure – and let it be said that it’s the most exceptionally loving of a gift by the grace of God in forever feeling such a tie to those so close to me whether it be in a loving embrace of the here and now or whether it’s in only the most moving of memories, either way it’s love and it’ll never end

i’m no different than the many of us in having lost loved ones that’ve already moved on from this version of what it is we believe life to be and just the same i’ve had the hidden blessing of realizing there was absolutely no other way other than completely leaning into God in trying to find my way back after hearing the words i don’t love you any more after nineteen years – yet even in this journey of the last four years of painfully great discovery to all that i was so blind to for the whole of my life i’m still defined by the one constant, the constant of love – and that it is as i’ve never stopped loving God and i’ve never stopped loving and believing in myself as well as believing in the promise that was placed in the very foundation of my heart as i believe it is in all of our hearts from our very first beat in that my greatest days are indeed ahead of me – i see it i believe it and i feel it everything the same – and just as it is within me so it is in front of me in the developing reality i live in as one in the same that i’m steadily coming to realize to my far greater happiness that i indeed decide uponand when that’s the clarity we’re coming from everything can only ever happen with passion – wishing you one in the same and God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~ 

with a rush and a wink…

May 31, 2015


a thrilling adventure began just several days ago yet it seems like one that’ll very likely be for a lifetime – at least that’s been the story for me all the way back to 1981 when my then all the way cooler than cool big brother jimmy came home that day with a copy of a brand new record titled moving pictures – and from there with just the one listen it was all over for the both of us as the very next thing big brother came home with was a shiny new set of perfectly loud sounding drums which i rather quickly commandeered away from him within just weeks thereby effectively returning him to the keys at which he was already very good at – and so it was that year as my 11th seeing the further and far faster fueling of what’s been an extraordinary time of it in one way or the other in the world of high-test rock’n’roll – mom set it all into motion with that wonderfully glorious console stereo piece that dad still has to this very day in the way of her always having it on – and she always had it on whether it was breathing life into one of her favorite records or whether she simply had it tuned into the hit parade of the day on some cool station out in the countryside of oregon and then thereafter right from another city that never sleeps as it was when we lived just outside of philadelphia – i was quite the fortunate son as well as that of the very well-loved little brother and i’ll never forget it let alone feel anything less than blessed because of it right to this very day –

and so it was in coming full circle just last sunday as a way of both congratulating a nephew for a job exceptionally well done as such an accomplished young man at eighteen just about to graduate as well as it being such a perfect way of further bonding together by way of the music we both love and very much live just the same as players – in fact a better resonating harmony there simply cannot be as indeed that’s where i’ve always found such an elevated vibrancy in life all throughout my years as relatively brief as they are effectively having only reached the age of 24 as an adult since first supposedly becoming one at 21, lol! – and in that greater spirit of the 45 year-old now at 24 we ran an amazing road trip to the southern reaches of florida that’ll forever stand out as the conversation was as steady as it was lively all the while with the drive in a 2015 mustang making it that much the better and at times the faster as well, lol again! – and just as my dear nephew duncan is all of eighteen so was i all those 27 years ago when big brother jimmy took me for the first of what has now ever so excitingly been ten times in seeing these favorite sons of the great white north and hands down my very favorite band in the world that we all otherwise best know simply as rush – what a truly grand time it was last sunday evening and i can only hope it’ll be the first of a lifetime of many more such wonderful experiences everything the same – wishing you all God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

all the way alive…

May 22, 2015

is exactly what it was we were all feeling at a level rarely found in contemporary music in quite the soul-flying fashion as it is when this modern day rock’n’roll superstar takes the stage – yet that’s what it was and that’s what it is when the man that made live opens it up and begins pouring his heart out like a phoenix in full flight – having had quite the wonderful fortune in seeing so many top-shelf and rather legendary artists over a relatively young lifetime, it’s my feeling in recollecting all the way back to seeing the king himself in late 1976 that i’ve never seen anyone better – he’s been behind the very finest of american made rock’n’roll ever since the release of the first live record titled mental jewelry and from there it’s been quite an elevated ride into the fast lane with the very best of anyone who’s ever recorded a song – yes such lofty words may get bandied about this way that way and the other far too often in the way of the hype machine that’s always surrounded the music scene yet with this cat every word of it’s well beyond meritorious – and that kind of merit only ever comes from having the goods to back it all up in the way of a history of groundbreaking records with a handful of them actually of quite the monumental standing such as throwing copper, secret samadhi and five – what’s further amazing from there’s just how commanding and complete of a performer he is clearly giving up every thread of his soul when he’s leading the band with his exceptionally passionate vocals, yes he’s truly that good – and then when he came out right into the fray with the rest of us free of any security he totally became one with an already well-enraptured audience that couldn’t have been any more elated at just how amazingly tight of a show was underway that evening – and to think it was just him and a friend on guitar pulling off an acoustic set with all of the thunder of the rest of a band that wasn’t even there left us all that much more the floored

he’s a famous writer, a fascinating singer and a frontman with all of the naturally fitting moxie that’s ever been necessary – he’s a fellow brother from pennsylvania and quite the friendly dude everything the same – and to me and to a great many he’s indeed a true diamond in the american cultural scene – and so it is i say to one edward joel kowalczyk thank you for all of the wonderful music and keep up the incredible work my friend! – wishing you all God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

not my chemicals…

May 3, 2015


are the words that arrived from the sudden image that instantly became all that i could see – as to why they appeared’s been an altogether rather common theme in recent years as meetings with one new soul to the next have been at a wonderfully high frequency, even more so with many of them having the most tender of hearts – and then again these very words arrived with everything of the same lucidity for that of the steadily emerging feeling of my living a newly-found and somewhat neverending party that’s rapidly taking over many of my days with a thrill and a smile that’s been missing for far too many years – it’s such a captivating way of life in connecting in to what it is and where it is i’m desiring to have the days of my life unfold with many of them now becoming more and more of exactly everything i’m imagining – it’s a gift that i’ve never taken lightly yet it’s also one that i’ve never appreciated this greatly as I’m steadily understanding on an entirely deeper and far more intrinsic level that it’s all straight from the hands of God himself – it’s all straight from the hands of God himself and that’s as good as it gets and indeed far better than anything else I could ever know or even wonder about – after all this life’s just a fantasy once we’ve truly awakened to the so-called reality of what it is to be alive and living life in the way that it’s intended to be lived at our own unique direction as given within – yet in stepping up and fully into this wonderful fantasy there’s a door that only we can ever be the ones to open in getting there as no one else no matter who they are can ever do it for us – and let it further be said that finding that door only ever comes from our quieting our mind in a way that we can actually let in that beautifully small and silent voice from within so as to begin hearing the very words of God as he speaks in the way of the holy spirit

and therein arrived that very image that day as the greatest awakening i’ve ever experienced in finally being led to realizing the difference – and truly realizing the difference came in finally understanding that as much as i knew it felt everything so wonderful in the way of all that’s so stimulating to the high-flying mind in the way of chemicals running about this way that way and every other way in between, i knew this was different – this was so very different in that these were not my chemicals, this was God – wishing you one in the very same and God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~


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