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i just can’t write it like i did at the beginning…

January 30, 2016

 yet in many unexpected ways that’s turning out to be a very good thing – after all in life it’s all about an evolution in the way of a measure of where we were, where we’re now at and indeed very much where we’re headed – so when a day arrives in a life and you’re feeling more in love than you’d ever felt before and it’s still with the same wonderful girl of nearly 20 years something so exceptionally heartening sweeps over the soul, at least that’s how it felt right up until 959 that evening – and then it happened as the line went dead some 1731 days ago – 

and in all of that time so many aspects of a life that once was have all but disappeared yet all the while so many amazing blessings have newly threaded their way into a heart that seemed as if it’d never heal – and while that’s certainly a feeling far lovelier than any words can ever say there’s nonetheless still a room within it all where a window’s permanently lifted in a fashion with the sheerest of curtains softly flittering about as if from the gentle winds of a summer day in an appearingly perfect place just barely outside of it all and somewhat distant just the same – it’s a place where an entirely different world’s on stage yet the voices are faint and any images only ever come in the swiftest, the sweetest and at times the saddest of visions – 

as much as it now all makes seemingly perfect sense at the same time I fear it’ll forever be something I’ll never completely understand until we meet again perhaps only as souls if not hopefully far sooner – and for the sake of the gift of precious life i’ve now been given for a second if not indeed a third time and what I now know so absolutely in my heart of hearts it is that i’m to be giving with it, i finally feel that i can truly accept it all – no sad stories are needed and no welling tears need shedding as I’m finally realizing what it is to truly love unconditionally – and to think it’s only taken an undying world of love that’s been said and given and proven to me by so many for so long and so patiently is to see a man who is perhaps for the very first time genuinely thankful – wishing you one in the very same and God’s every blessing ~rettingerrockfiles/RRF~

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